Killing Loneliness
by lulu9994
Summary: He didn't know how to admit he loved her. Admitting his feelings was never easy especially surrounded by zombies who wanted nothing more than to kill. From the moment he learned her secret he wanted nothing more than to keep her safe and show her that he wasn't an emotionless robot. He wanted to find something he was never able to find in the past. (Does not follow the show)
There were two things that Daryl Dixon wasn't sure. 1. Was the world ever going to go back to normal and 2. His feelings for Holly Grimes. He frowned thinking about the latter as he lay back scooting a bit closer to the fire. This was the last thing he wanted. Now wasn't the time to be falling some girl he knew nothing about. He didn't want to care about someone. After what happened with Sophia he never wanted to care for another person again. It had been forever since Sophia had been killed but he still was bitter in so many ways.

Daryl hadn't really paid much attention to Holly for the first couple of weeks after her arrival. Granted he had actually been out in the woods keeping to himself not wanting to be around other breathing humans. When he had finally decided to come back to the group he was automatically shocked to see the pretty girl sitting beside Rick.

"Who's she?"

He asked Carol quietly. Carol frowned.

"Apparently Rick's sister who just showed up out of nowhere."

Daryl frowned noting the odd tone in Carol's voice as he looked back to the girl a few feet away. She was without a doubt younger then Rick and shared his blue eyes. Her long light brown curls reached midway down her back. Was Daryl interested in talking to her or getting to know her? No. She could be decent eye candy and for now that was enough.

Over the following few weeks Daryl and Holly slowly began a friendship. Even though Daryl didn't want to get close to her; he couldn't stay away. She was kind. Holly was no normal "Mary Sue" either. She almost had a better shot than her brother and didn't care to get dirty. There was also the fact that she was actually making him smile. Who did that? Daryl couldn't even place when the last time he smiled was.

As he got closer to her, Daryl got to see more reasons why he should be keeping an eye on her. The first was Shane. He didn't like the way the man looked at Holly. Something just rubbed Daryl the wrong way and normally his intuition on people was correct.

"Good morning."

Daryl looked up from his thoughts to see Holly looking at him with her warm smile.

"Hey"

He said as she handed him a cup of steaming liquid. Daryl gave her a careful look. Holly laughed.

"It's not poison! I promise I am not trying to kill you. I found some instant coffee on that run the other day."

Daryl nodded taking a tentative sip. It had been the first time in months that he actually tasted coffee and it was the closest thing to heaven he had at the moment.

"You're on my favorite person list just so you know."

He said with a rare smile. Holly laughed as Daryl took a few more sips of the coffee before looking at her closer.

"Can I ask you something?"

Holly nodded. She looked at the man in front of her carefully. In the beginning, she wasn't for sure how she felt about Daryl. He wouldn't really say much to her for a few weeks but they were quickly developing a friendship. She could tell they had a lot in common. Neither really wanted to do much talking to those around them.

In the beginning, when Rick had found her and brought her safely to the farm she wasn't sure about anyone there. Holly had never really been close to Lori but she put with her for Carl. Carl was her pet. From the day Carl was born he was what Holly loved most in the world. She never planned on becoming a mother herself so she would love her nephew as if he was hers.

After getting to know everyone and giving everyone a chance Holly was pleased with everyone else. The only one that kind of stumped her was Carol. At first, Carol was nice to her but as Holly's friendship with Daryl intensified Carol seemed to be hating her more and more every day. Holly frowned at the thought of Carol and Daryl together. She forced herself to get over the jealous pit that was forming in her stomach. Was there something that she should be aware of with them? Daryl had never elaborated on it to her if there was. Granted she and Daryl really didn't talk about their love lives or anything of that nature.

"Holly?"

Holly snapped out of her thoughts looking into Daryl's eyes.

"I'm sorry what did you want to ask?"

Daryl blinked a few times as Shane and Rick walked in.

"Nevermind."

He said quietly before going back to the cup of coffee in his hands. Holly meanwhile, smiled at her brother but wouldn't look Shane in the eye as he closed in on her.

"You gonna say something?"

He asked in the snarky voice that made her skin crawl.

"Get the hell away from me Walsh. You happy? I said something."

She said crossing her arms over her chest. Shane frowned rolling his eyes muttering "Bitch" under his breath. Daryl looked up now.

"Leave her alone. Go on now."

Daryl said crossly. Shane, Holly, and Rick all turned to look at Daryl a little shocked by his comment. Everyone was used to Shane and Holly bickering back and forth. If they spent one day without having words, it was a rare day indeed. Shane scoffed before turning and walking from the room rolling his eyes. Rick meanwhile shrugged and looked to his sister who was holding out a cup of her instant Starbucks to him.

"For me?"

Holly nodded with a smile.

"You and Daryl. I'll share with you two. Anyone else can go get their own."

Rick smiled reaching out to pet his sister's face but she moved away. With a sigh, Rick shook his head forgetting that his sister wouldn't let him touch her. She didn't like physical contact anymore. The only person that she would let touch her was Carl. Holly never put up a fight when his son went to her for a hug or cuddle.

"Well thank you sis."

Rick said sitting down at the table without another word.

Later that night Daryl stood quietly beside Holly on the front porch looking out into the yard as rain poured. The others had gone to bed hours before leaving Daryl and Holly to keep watch for the first half of the night. It had begun raining after dinner time and it had only increased over the following hours. Daryl lit a cigarette in his hand before looking over to Holly who was watching the rain pour. She looked beautiful standing there still dressed in her day clothes. After a moment, Holly's blue eyes rolled to his.

"So what was you wanting to ask me earlier?"

Daryl took a drag off his cigarette.

"Nothin."

Holly sighed.

"Come on Daryl. It was something. I can tell by the look on your face. Its ok. You can ask.

Daryl tossed the cigarette before running a hand through his shaggy hair.

"What's with you and Shane? What did he do to you? I see ya wince whenever he gets within breathing distance."

Holly looked down feeling her face blush.

"Nothin."

Daryl scoffed.

"Didn't look like nothin to me."

Holly looked up.

"Fine. It is something. A couple of years ago I agreed to go on a date with Shane. Long story short I went back to his place like an idiot and he raped me. I'll save you the details. Basically he snapped when I said I wouldn't sleep with him. Apparently his mommy and daddy never told him no enough as a child and when someone does now he goes ape shit. I never reported it because he was a cop in town and no one would believe me. Hell my own brother doesn't even know."

Daryl looked horrified almost pissed!

"I knew he was a prick! I had a feeling this would be the answer I would get. I was prayin I was wrong. Now I want to kill him. I was kinda thinkin he had done something horrible to ya. I see how you won't let anyone touch you not even your brother. It all makes sense now."

Holly nodded looking down not able to meet Daryl's face. She couldn't look into his eyes. Would he see her as dirty? Was any hope that she could have had with him ruined?

"Yeah well you were right…as usual."

Holly said softly. She heard Daryl beginning to walk. Figuring he had walked away Holly sighed sadly.

"Look at me kid."

His voice was closer now. Holly looked up as he stepped forward slowly.

"I won't let that prick hurt ya again. I'll kill him myself first. If you were my girl you wouldn't be worryin over shitheads like him. You wouldn't be gettin hurt again…at least not that I could help."

Holly smiled.

"You can touch me."

Daryl was still wary as he stepped forward.

"I'm not going to get an arrow in the ass am I?"

Holly shook her head as she stepped forward sealing the distance between them.

"Nah you're safe."

Daryl felt his heart pound as he realized fully that Holly was standing right against him. He wasn't expecting this by any means.

"I'm not really good at this kinda stuff."

He said as Holly reached forward taking his rough hand in hers. She felt tiny to him almost like delicate china…. china that could kick your ass. Holly meanwhile, tried to ignore the pool of nervousness that was gathering in her stomach. Daryl wasn't Shane! They were two different men. Daryl wouldn't do the things Shane did to her! He would be a decent man and he deserved a chance.

"You can kiss me."

She suggested sheepishly. It took Daryl a minute to register fully what she said before moving forward and leaning his face to hers. Holly didn't fight him as he slowly began to kiss her instead she eagerly kissed him back.

When he pulled away Daryl looked down into Holly's captivating eyes feeling for the first time in a long time fully happy. Holly reached up pushing his hair away from his face.

"So what does it take to be your girl?"

Daryl chuckled.

"You say the word."

Holly remained close to him keeping her hand locked in his.

"I'm your girl."

Daryl nodded.

"There ya go."


End file.
